Happy Marriage...Happy Family...

I love how God drops things into my lap when I'm lease expecting it...especially when I do not have the extra time to spend on much other than my family!  More on that later...

I haven't posted here in a while because I've been simplifying my life.  I made my personal facebook (fb) page more about "very close friends & family" and cleaned the ever-expanding email closet.  It amazes me how little things like that can clutter our thoughts and mind...creating an overwhelming feeling of having too much stuff to tend to and do.

Okay, back to what happened to me this morning.  While on fb, I came across a page where a Dr. of Psychiatry was asking for our advice on different situations.  There was a man that had an issue with smoking marijuana and aggressive anger issues.  He has two children and a wife that he is about to lose if he doesn't change.  I felt so compelled to share my heart with him.  I don't know him...but I felt the Holy Spirit leading me to share my thoughts.  Please lift him up in prayer...his name is Ian.

Now, why I'm I telling you...because what I shared with him will encourage you...because it is not from me but from God.

"A happy marriage and family begins with a solid foundation and relationship with Jesus Christ.  Then the best thing any parent can do for their children is to love each other!" 

Steps for a Happy Marriage & Happy Family:

1.  Let God lead your family.  Read the Bible, God's actual words and pray often!
2.  Admire your spouse, love them and pay special attention to them.
3.  Be godly examples for your children ... when you make a mistake...make it right. 


Here are some excellent resources to encourage you...there are so many out there, so I'm just sharing a few.

1. Watch "Fireproof" together.  Buy the book, "The Love Dare"
2. Watch "Courageous" together...awesome movie...especially for dads.
3. Read, "The Five Love Languages"  ~ find out what your needs really are and what your gifts are.
4. Marriage Today ~ website about marriage.

Happy New Year and may God bless each one of your marriages and families!
:) Jennifer

(This would work too...lol)

Sibling Rivalry ~ There is a Solution! (Part 2)

The solution lies in teaching them to be respectful of each other. We tell our children that this means no hitting, yelling or name-calling. Ask before you borrow something that belongs to your siblings; and sometimes let them go first. Always be there for them when they are hurting and never choose your friends over your brothers and sisters. You are probably thinking this sounds impossible…not really. Teach them this way and it becomes second nature.   It is not a one-time lesson either.  You will have to be consistent and stay on top of it.  That is what good parenting involves.  Parenting is certainly not for the lazy or selfish...at least that is what I have had to learn.  It is best not to ignore the arguing.  If they do not resolve it on their own, step in to show them how.  Then let them have some time, with-in earshot, to talk it out.

For the most part, our 5 children get along wonderfully. They play well together and have great relationships with each other. We home school our children so they spend extreme amount of time together. So yes, as you can imagine, there is the occasional argument and tattling. My husband and I have made it a point to teach our children to respect each other’s feelings and belongings. If we solved every problem that arises for them, then they learn nothing about solving for themselves. So this is where we apply the, “talk it out” technique that I pointed you to in the last post.  We used it this morning and it works wonders!

I must say, I do love the "talk it out" technique that Ms. Davies wrote about in her article, "Tattling vs. Reporting":

Have the two disputing children face each other.

Listen to each other tell what happened.

Wait for their turn to speak.

Be polite.

Discuss ways to work out the problem.

Agree on what to do.

Shake hands.

Our family also added; apologize for your part in it and accept the apology when given. They say that they love each other and end it with a hug. As parents, we want them to understand that hurtful actions/words cut deep. Arguments happen, but it is how they argue and end them that count! Just as the Lord tells us in His word, the Bible…do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. ~ Ephesians 4:26.   If you do, resentment and deeper hurt can grow.

Here is the link to Ms. Leah Davies' Parent Tips and website:  Kelly Bears   I am not sure of her religious views, but I can tell you that her advice is wonderful and goes right along with how Christians should raise their children. Scroll down to the bottom of her webpage and check out the Youtube video of her. It will give you an idea of what her philosophy is towards parenting.

 May God bless every effort you exert towards raising children who actually like each other!

Apologies

Arrows for the Lord: Apologies This is a repost from one of the first posts I made on this blog. Hope it speaks to your heart.

Taming the Tattletale & Managing Sibling Rivalry....

I recently had a conversation with a dear friend about how on earth we were going to help our kids survive sibling rivalry, and how to help the tattletales in our families.  It truly can be frustrating and difficult to be objective when your are ready to duct tape them to the wall!  (just kidding....) 

I have found that it is better to have a game plan.  When the situation arises I can keep a level head and teach our children how to work through their disagreements while keeping their friendship intact.  After all, if they do not learn to work through disagreements as children...they will grow into adult siblings who are not able to get along.  We are doing them a huge favor by teaching them now.  I know of families that the adult siblings are estranged because they could not work through arguments.  It is truly sad to hear about.  Friends come and go...family is forever.  It is worth all of the effort it takes to show them the right way to argue and how to make things right and move on.

Since I am certainly not an expert, I did a little research to see what the experts might have to say.  Below are two fantastic resources.  One technique that our family uses, is discussed in the first article below.  I started using this technique when I taught school, long before we had our children.  It works wonders!  Teaching communication is key to success.


Tattling Versus Reporting ~ an AWESOME article on how to handle these situations.  I use her, "talk it out" method...all the time.  It has helped our children realize that their siblings have feelings and what it means to respect each other.

Sibling Rivalry ~ Focus on the Family, several great suggestions to help with this subject.

It did not cross my mind that when I signed up to be a mother that I was also signing up to be referee, psychologist, counselor and life coach.  As overwhelming as it can be at times, I remind myself that my Heavenly Father is right beside me guiding me all the way.

May God bless you as you raise arrows for Him!  Blessings ~ Jennifer

Book I'm Currently Reading...

I'm almost finished with the first book I've read in a very long time...other than my precious instruction book for life...The Bible!  It is by Lisa Whelchel called, "Friendship for Grown-Ups".  I highly recommend you sprint over to the nearest book store or better yet, ordering in off the link in red above!  You will be amazed at what you will learn about friendship....I thought I knew all there was to know about it.  Believe me, there is so much more....like identifying unsafe friends. 

I recently heard her speak at Riverbend in Glen Rose.  I bought some books thinking...maybe I would find time to read...haven't been able to put them down...well, actually I've had to put them down several times...you know, kiddos...  

She seems so sweet...I felt compelled to show her a picture of my five precious gifts from the Lord...she probably thought I was a weirdo...she made a nice comment and then told me she liked my wallet...of course she's got great taste...lol...I was beaming that I had a chance to meet her in person...and not because she's famous...because she's just like us...a mom, wife, daughter, friend...plus she homeschools and love Jesus with all her heart...I feel like we are kindred spirits...we should totally hang out sometime!

I also purchased her homeschooling book and the MomTime Moments CD...which I love...it is funny because I listen to it as I am driving...the kids hear it too...kinda nice to hear another mother tell them some of the same things I try to tell them....love that double-team effect! 

Happy Reading!

What book are you reading?  Share the title of a good book that we need to read!  Hugs to y'all ~ Jenn

(*come back soon...my next post is about sibling rivalry & the ever-present tattletale...)

Multi-Tasking Maniac!

(a revised and updated post from my private blog: Life as a Texas Kid-Wrangler)

An online dictionary defines mania as the following: (answers.com)

mania n. An excessively intense enthusiasm, interest, or desire; a craze: a mania for neatness.

Well, that pretty much describes me! I have this perfect world created in my head. You know, the one where your house is neat and tidy all the time, and there is not one ounce of clutter! For most of us, this is an unrealistic goal. I found myself cleaning the tub, the other day, while taking a shower!

That is how my multi-tasking life is, on a daily basis. If I bend down to pick something up off the floor...I look for other things to pick up while I'm down there. I have decided that multi-tasking is a talent that must be honed. I am constantly looking for an easier, quicker way of doing things. 

(I have found this great website to help deal with my long list of stuff to do! Check it out! There's lots of great suggestions to help you manage the housework and clutter.    Flylady.net)

People tell me all the time, "Don't worry about your house...the mess will always be there...your kids will grow up and be gone...spend time with them...now". Honestly, I understand they mean well, but what planet are they from? If I did what they recommended...we would be naked and barricaded in by a wall of laundry and dust bunnies the size of Manhattan! I have found that finding a balance between managing my home, preparing healthy menus, educating the kids, playing with the kids, romancing my husband AND finding special time for me to DE-STRESS, is "almost" impossible to do.  It is very easy to feel overwhelmed.  I remind myself that it is okay to have PB& H (honey) for dinner from time to time, close the door to the laundry room, and let the kids read their favorite book after lunch instead of checking off each subject on the lesson plan for the day.  Breathe...relax...enjoy life one day at a time.

We must remember, as my dear friend Miranda wrote in her recent blog post...“Well, I’m not perfect.  We are not perfect, and we will not be until the day we step into our glorified body in Heaven."  Amen to that, sista!

So, note-to-self...you are not super mom! Clean a little each day, do a couple loads of laundry each day and stick to the menu you have planned out. Make teaching your priority during the day and spend some time in the evening letting Brady know how special he is and that I admire/respect him...but most importantly...start my day with my Heavenly Father...He will direct my path!

Here are two scriptures that remind me of who is in charge and how He will be there for me if I will just let Him!  Hope they bless you too!

Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 

Matthew 11:28

I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint."

Jeremiah 31:25

As for the special time for me...I'm working on it. Writing on this blog seems to help me a little. I think I will add a long soak in the jacuzzi tub on about Wednesday night of each week.

Okay, what do you do for special time for you? Let's encourage each other to relax!

Sandpaper people...

A sandpaper person is someone who "rubs" you the wrong way. They say and do things that upset you and usually have a prideful attitude. You find yourself avoiding them and running in the opposite direction when you see them coming. Negative thoughts flood your mind when you merely hear their name. We all have encountered at least one in our lives.

The best thing to do is stop running! Start praying.

Get things right with God in your own life first.

"Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults. Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, and I shall be innocent of great transgression". Psalm 19:12-13 NKJV

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast
spirit within me". Psalm 50:10 NKJV

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting". Psalm 139:23-24 NKJV

Ask God to teach you to love them the way He loves them.

“Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” Ephesians 4:2 NLT

Not one of us is perfect. Remembering this will keep us humbled and less likely to run from the sandpaper people in our lives.

If you are a sandpaper person...confess it and turn away from rubbing people the wrong way. God can create, in all of us, a clean heart.  Since we have all probably been considered a sandpaper person to someone...pray and ask God to help you walk blameless, to have compassion, mercy and grace when it come to others.  Let your speech be gentle.  Consider what the other person may be going through.

Have you had sandpaper people in your life? How did you handle it? Do you feel like you grew through the experience? Share your opinion.

Here is a great devotion on how to love sandpaper people. Blessings ~ Jennifer

 

*revised post from 8/22/08

A Christian's Purpose for Living

As I studied God's Word this morning, I came across this verse:

We tell others about Christ, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all the wisdom God has given us. We want to present them to God, perfect in their relationship to Christ.  Colossians 1:28 (NLT)

As Christian's, this is our sole purpose for living and our primary task.  Yes, it is impotant to help the needy and pray over our family and friends...but isn't it more important to know that they have a personal relationship with Christ?

According to Christ, (The Great Commission) Christian parents must demonstrate, for their children, how to share Christ with family, friends and strangers.  Start at Wal-Mart...the person who checks out your groceries, is your captive audience.  You have 8 to 10 minutes to visit with them.  Pray for God to prepare their heart and open the door for you to share about your relationship with Christ.  As you drive through Schlotzsky's ... be nice, smile and say, "May God bless you today."  End it by handing them a tract.  Then talk to your children about what just took place.  When they see that you are not afraid to talk about Christ to everyone you meet....they will share Christ on the playground and at Burger King!

Ask people what their spiritual beliefs are...and then just listen.  You will immediately find out if they have accepted Christ or not. The best way to be prepared to share Christ is to study God's Word, pray and ask Him to place the lost in your path.  Then the Holy Spirit will direct you.  Here are two excellent resources to prepare you as well.  Share Jesus Without Fear  & The Way of the Master

Order a Witness Bracelet or make one with your kids.  When people ask about it...then you have an opportunity to share Christ. 

Here is a great poem to wrap up with.

MY FRIEND
My friend, I stand in judgment now,
and feel that you're to blame somehow.

On earth, I walked with you by day,

and never did you show the way.
You knew the Lord in truth and glory,
But never did you tell the story.
My knowledge then was very dim,
You could have led the way to Him.
Though we lived together here on earth,
you never told of the second birth,
And now I stand before eternal hell,
because of heaven's glory you didn't tell!
You taught me many things, that's true;
I called you "friend" and trusted you,
But now I learn, when it's too late --
You could have saved me from this fate.
We walked and talked by dawn and night,
And yet, you showed me not His light.
You let me live and love and die,
You knew I'd never live on high.
Yes, I called you "friend" in life,
And trusted you through joy and strife,
And yet on coming to the end --
I cannot call you now "my friend".
Author: unknown


How do you share Christ with others? 
How do you teach your children to share Christ?

Women of Faith & World Vision

It's time to refresh yourself and have fun at the same time! Attend the Woman of Faith Conference near you! You deserve it!

I just got back from a Women of Faith Conference in Dallas....can I just say WOW!

This was my first time, and certainly not my last! I guess I expected it to be a mini-concert and motivational speaking...it was SO much more! I danced, sang, cried, laughed, worshipped and ate at TGIF's at nearly midnight on Friday! It was so fun to hang out with the girls and grow closer to my Heavenly Father all at the same time!

I enjoyed all of the speakers, but my favorite was Lisa Whelchel. She is about my age and homeschools! We have a bit in common!
Steven Curtis Chapman & Mandisa were amazing!

I was most moved by the stories from President Richard Stearns from World Vision ... So moved that we are now sponsoring a precious little 7 year old girl named Dimpho from South Africa! I do not tell you this for any praise on our family...but to encourage you to sponsor a child....it is $35 per month...you spend that much eating out once in a month. Give it up to change a life. Our new little girl is so worth it! There are so many more waiting. Our conference in Dallas broke the world record of signing up sponsors! Praise the Lord!

God Bless you Mr. Stearns!


Tell me about your sponsored child!
Blessings ~ Jennifer

Healing Scriptures...

If we are not careful, we can become overwhelmed and burdened to a point that we lose sight of the hope that is in our Heavenly Father...the One who is in control. The Great Physician!

My children ask, "Why does God let people get sick?" My response was that we do not always understand why things happen, but that we are to keep our eyes on the Lord and know that He loves us. Our lives serve a purpose for Him, and all we do (and go through) should glorify Him...even during sickness.  He NEVER leaves us...especially while we are walking through a trial. Prayer is the best thing we can do for ourselves and others while they are sick and hurting.  Here is a wonderful site that lists scriptures about healing.  Healing Scriptures


My Daily Prayer List - Here is my own personal sheet that helps me keep up with prayers and praises!


Blessings ~ Jennifer